Life Lessons at the Bathroom Sink

Over break, we spent time with our niece, who is six years old. As I helped her get ready for bed, she spat out the toothpaste after half a swish and proceeded to rinse her brush as if done. I called her on it, and she insisted she had finished. Incredulously, I thought, "I'm standing right here watching you!" But with a stubbornness that can outlast that of a first-grader, I finally got her teeth brushed that evening. The interaction sparked some thought. Here I am, older and wiser, with this child lying straight to me. Admittedly over a relatively trivial thing - but character informs the casual everyday choices infinitely more often than the "big decisions" - nor was it malicious. But no less a lie. Picture the scene - this very young child trying to sell me on something that we both know to be patently false. Really? Guts coupled with ignorance - and it certainly happens all the time. I'm not a child psychologist (by training, at least), but it has to be a flavor of the boundary-testing and exertion of independence that seems to be human nature, especially in growing up. Give it a try - if they buy it, then you're off the hook. And getting away with it once emboldens. The vigilance that a parent must have to keep these untruths of youth from manifesting themselves into a pervasive habit - to say nothing of the tenacity required... an exhausting job. Makes me wonder how many times I appeared completely foolish in front of my parents, thinking I know more than they do and trying to convince them of it. I'm sure I still do it. But the scope of this foolishness can't be understood without the other perspective. It's not limited to parents and children, either, it's present in the academic dishonesty at school. And extrapolated further, how many times do I pray, talking to God about something that's going on and rationalizing or justifying my actions; meanwhile, He's standing right next to me, knowing full well I haven't finished brushing my teeth. Yet, His patience for our absurdity is infinite. It was a good reminder of the transparency I aspire to have, to say nothing of the insight into the requirements of parenthood.